An unknown offshoot of the common and popular garden flower Iris of the Iridaceac family, is the unpredictable (and dare I say unpopular when compared to its suburban counterpart) Iridenoptera, or Winged Iris. Often mistaken for the common Iris, its distinction lies in its ability to swarm with other Iride in a fashion not unlike some of the more ambitious ant colonies described in the early exploration documents of Kurt Brussel (Collective Cognitive of Congo Hymenoptera, 1935) and even the more fanciful descriptions of winged plantain described in Tolson’s interactions with the Tremeguará and Tupinaquim tribes of the more dense tropic regions of Brazil (Observations in Floresta Amazônica, 1917). While the common Iris is hardly a tropic plant, preferring the cooler climates of northern European and North American regions, there have been suggestions — and even heated debate — among the Insectivorous Plantae community about just how far Iridenoptere crosses the line. Iridiacs declare that stem patterns and leaf variations are too similar to Irideae to permit separation from the family, while Hymenopterists argue the crossover to Insecti is blatantly apparent through analysis of body segmentation and locomotive traits— even going to far as to suggest that Iridiacs are simply looking for attention— often citing outspoken iridiac Buress’s now notorious comment at the 2009 Iride conference of “falling funds due to the banality of Iris study”. Planticarnatics choose to disregard locomotion, expressing the importance of the protocarnivorous traits, but even these have not been confirmed. A lot about the Winged Iris is still unclear, due to the rareness of the genus, but also due to the imminent danger surrounding close study. Most agree that they clearly do not ingest flesh. This was concluded in the applicable iris biopsy report Inner Workings of Agile Irideae (1996) as well as the few subsequent — and tragic — reports that followed. However they have been documented to consume flesh. The most important example of this is the footage collected in 2005 by Robert Scherrer, in which a swarm of iride consume an adult human male (albeit an immature one) in roughly 5 seconds.

An unknown offshoot of the common and popular garden flower Iris of the Iridaceac family, is the unpredictable (and dare I say unpopular when compared to its suburban counterpart) Iridenoptera, or Winged Iris. Often mistaken for the common Iris, its distinction lies in its ability to swarm with other Iride in a fashion not unlike some of the more ambitious ant colonies described in the early exploration documents of Kurt Brussel (Collective Cognitive of Congo Hymenoptera, 1935) and even the more fanciful descriptions of winged plantain described in Tolson’s interactions with the Tremeguará and Tupinaquim tribes of the more dense tropic regions of Brazil (Observations in Floresta Amazônica, 1917). While the common Iris is hardly a tropic plant, preferring the cooler climates of northern European and North American regions, there have been suggestions — and even heated debate — among the Insectivorous Plantae community about just how far Iridenoptere crosses the line. Iridiacs declare that stem patterns and leaf variations are too similar to Irideae to permit separation from the family, while Hymenopterists argue the crossover to Insecti is blatantly apparent through analysis of body segmentation and locomotive traits— even going to far as to suggest that Iridiacs are simply looking for attention— often citing outspoken iridiac Buress’s now notorious comment at the 2009 Iride conference of “falling funds due to the banality of Iris study”. Planticarnatics choose to disregard locomotion, expressing the importance of the protocarnivorous traits, but even these have not been confirmed. A lot about the Winged Iris is still unclear, due to the rareness of the genus, but also due to the imminent danger surrounding close study. Most agree that they clearly do not ingest flesh. This was concluded in the applicable iris biopsy report Inner Workings of Agile Irideae (1996) as well as the few subsequent — and tragic — reports that followed. However they have been documented to consume flesh. The most important example of this is the footage collected in 2005 by Robert Scherrer, in which a swarm of iride consume an adult human male (albeit an immature one) in roughly 5 seconds.

2012 Jan 23 / Notes